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Writer's pictureMichele Schwartz

We Can Do Really Hard Things




We can do really hard things.


I’ll say it again. Maybe say it with me....


We

can do

really hard things.


Nothing about life right now is easy. But then again, when in life is anything really ever easy? Maybe what is considered easy, is only easy because we don’t know anything otherwise. I know for me, easy things have always been accompanied by hard things.


Life right now sure is different. Different than we’ve ever known. But it doesn’t mean that we can’t continue to push through as best as we can. We are all doing the best we can. We are all doing what we think is right for ourselves, for our families, for our children. To me, I still treat this current time as it’s a life or death situation. And not because the media has scared me into it, but because I’m not willing to take a chance to find out what might happen if we don’t. I can’t and I won’t subject myself, my kids, or my family and my family won’t subject me or my husband or my kids. It’s what we all feel comfortable doing. And I have to believe that the way my family is choosing to live, is quite the norm right now, for the time being. But then again with all the steps being taken to possibly shut us down again, maybe not. Maybe others are getting too complacent and tired of all of this pandemic stuff. Maybe those people are in the majority. Do I believe my family is right? Yep. Are we being too cautious? Maybe. But, yes, we would rather still live with caution for the time being, for however long that is, safe and doing everything we can to not catch this virus because we Just. Don’t. Know. We don’t know. We don’t know if it will be as serious as they say. We don’t know if our bodies can handle it. We don’t know if we will end up in a hospital. We don’t know if it will lead to death. We don’t know. But since there has been a lot of death and there are people living with life long ailments that might have been able to be prevented if the proper precautions were in place, I will choose to stay vigilant and cautious and can only pray that others out there will choose to do so too.


But no matter what, the one thing that should always be in the back of our minds, is how we are portraying ourselves to our children. These little eyes are watching. Their little ears are listening and their amazing brains are absorbing.... everything. Our words, our body language, our emotions, our anger, or our acceptance. They see and hear it all.


Our own six year old is in first grade and is 100% virtual for the entire school year. He has been since the school year started back in September. I have sat in his room while he is “in school” to help him. I have listened to his teacher and his classmates. I have witnessed times of extreme joy during the school day and I have also witnessed times of struggles. I have had conversations with him, when he states that it is hard to sit in front of a screen for 4 hours a day. And I know how tough it really is….I see it first hand. So we talk and I listen. And then I help and reassure. When he is mad or upset I comfort as best as I can and I also validate his feelings. And when he says it’s hard, my response is always, yes it’s very hard. But we are meant to do hard things. And if you stick with it, as hard as it might be, when it’s over you’ll look back and say wow I did it. And then you’ll feel happy because you did something hard, that you thought you wouldn’t be able to do. And then I give him some examples. Examples of times I thought something was too hard and times where he might have felt the same way. And I always, always ask him how I can make it better for him. So then we problem solve and we come up with solutions. And then if and when it happens again, we do the same exact thing. But the one thing I won’t do… I will never stop telling him that we can do hard things.


We have to teach our children to persevere when things get tough. We teach them to push forward and to not give up. And now more than ever, they need this encouragement. Now is the time to instill in them these ever so important skills that will help them in every single area of their lives. Kids are amazing. They are so strong and brave and resilient. With support and encouragement, they will be okay. If this same little boy, at only four years old, could see his mother battle stage 3 breast cancer with all the aggressive treatments and surgeries, and now at 6 years old is okay, then after this pandemic is over, they will all be okay. We will all be okay.


And what I can also tell you is that cancer treatment is rough. I’m talking about 16 rounds of chemotherapy, a couple of surgeries including a bilateral mastectomy, 28 rounds of radiation and so much more. And I’m going to be honest….Cancer treatments make you feel like death or whatever death might feel like. I am not disputing that times are tough right now, but I’ll say this… that if I and many others out there can survive something that is close to what death might feel like, then this pandemic…. We’ve got this. We can do this. No matter how you have to do it, you’ve got this. You can still stay in. You can wear a mask. You can distance yourselves from others. And the great thing that comes from all of that, is that you are still alive, and hopefully are still healthy. As others have stated to me, there eventually will be a light at the end of the tunnel.


What we have to believe is that we can do hard things. We have to feel it. We have to know it. We have to keep it in our minds. If not, then our children won’t. And our children have to know that they can do anything… even if it’s hard.





Your "One Tough Warrior Mama"








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